You wont believe me, I would if you told me so.

I recently realized that I am deeply afraid of everything and that I am deeply paranoid. Why this is, I couldn't honestly tell you, sometimes I'd like to think that it's some form of karma whooping my ass so hard I won't feel it until I'm in hell and it comes at me in the form of a pitchfork beelining for my face. So yeah, I'm pretty much boned for life if I keep with the way I'm going.
I hate constantly fearing walking into a grocery store and fearing that someone had a bad day and that they decided to take it out on the same grocery store I'm in at that exact same moment and most times I do what I can to get in and out because of reasons like that one.
I was recently driving home from a trip to Best Buy and that was when I first realized how much I am afraid of the things around me that I cannot control, for example, I was driving home from this particular trip, and I found myself at a stoplight and I was compelled to look over to the lane to the right of me where I noticed a man who looked quite disgruntled in his Chevy work van and i was instantly hit with a wave of terror, and the problem was there was almost nothing "legal" I could do about it. In so many ways I felt like I was going to have a nervous breakdown for absolutely no reason and it's things like that, that don't allow me to sleep at night, sometimes I fear that someone is going to break into my room at night, put a gun to my head, and give me the sweet end I desperately do not wish for.
I think that this is, in the words of John Mayer, a quarter life crisis, and that I am trying to find a way to get over these innate and ridiculous fears that I have. I think that I was born with all of these fears and that I am constantly afraid that someone somewhere is plotting to fuck me over and try and hurt me. These things lead me to believe and realize how ridiculous my fears are, but at the same time I believe that these same fears have kept me alive for as long as they have. I feel that these fears are completely crazy while all the while 100% legitimate and it drives me nuts, because while I know that I can't survive without them and I cannot live sanely with them, so what do I do? Where do I draw the line?
I am tired of waking up in the middle of the night in a cold sweat after being absolutely terrified by a nightmare that is going to affect me for the rest of the day. I've been told by so many people to see a therapist, but I honestly fear that they will tell me I have some sort of terrible mental disorder and that I need to take medication for whatever problem it is and honestly I hate taking medication, not only is it too much hassle, it's enough to fuck with my head, and I hate medication. I cannot stress that enough.
Day by day, I find ways to recuperate and I get myself out of the rut I'm in. I think one of the main things I need to remember is that most of what I think is just irrational and that it's simply just the thoughts that make me human. If it weren't for these thoughts though, I think I would be much, much better off.